*Khloé Kardashian opened up about her relationship with God and her spiritual journey in an essay for Lenny Letter. After a whirlwind marriage and divorce from Lamar Odom, which was put on hold after the former NBA player was hospitalized last year, Kardashian has filed divorce papers again – even though she claims she doesn’t believe in divorce.
In her essay, she explains how growing up in a religious family and dealing with the death of her father, the late Robert Kardashian, shaped her views on spirituality.
Below is an excerpt:
My relationship with spirituality has changed over the years, but I’ve never stopped believing. I enjoy going to church, I just haven’t found a church that I’m passionate about, where I fit in. But I have daily devotionals. Every Christmas my mom buys them for me — they tell me a prayer and give me a scripture. The devotions are just one page each, with a quote from the Bible, a breakdown of its meaning, and a daily prayer. Sometimes it’s hard for me to absorb all the information at once, so I like that the daily devotions are small enough that I can really retain the message. I read these affirmations to my glam squad every day. They think I’m nuts, but I love it, and that works for me.
READ RELATED STORY: Khloé Kardashian Reportedly Boots Ex’s Daddy from his Home
I’m very conversational with God and spirits. I talk to myself and to them but sometimes unconventionally. I’ll be lying in bed and just say out loud, “Lord, thank you so much for keeping my brother and sisters healthy!” Every night I say my prayers, often with my nieces and nephews. I talk a lot to my dad if I’m feeling something where I wish he were here to guide me. I just don’t believe praying has to be so structured. Sometimes I’ll just ramble. And I pray more when I’m thankful than in times of need. It’s a time of self-reflection. I like to give praise and gratitude. I know how fortunate I am.
I’ve been blessed with a lot in my life, and I’ve also had challenges. It was a challenge for me when I decided to get divorced. At my core, I don’t believe in divorce, but I came to a point in my marriage where I had to make the choice to take care of my own mental and emotional well-being in order to protect myself and my happiness. I am at peace with that decision and do feel like I honored my vows to the very end. I feel that I kept the serious vows I made in front of God with every inch of my heart, which is why I am still honoring them today even though my relationship with my ex-husband is in a different place. I believe in caring for my partner — past or present — “in sickness and in health,” and feel at peace with my relationship with God even after the fact. I’m thankful that I can rely on my God, who, along with my family, has led me through some of the most difficult times of my life.
To read the rest of Khloé’s essay, click here.